My littlest guy, Leo, does the cutest freaking thing.
Whenever something doesn’t go the way he wants it to go, he says “Oh, Biscuits! Well, maybe next time.”
It’s hard not to smile and laugh a little at how wholesome and sweet it is.
Leo often takes disappointment in stride. Of course he has his impatient moments, too - he’s only 6, after all.
By contrast, his brother can be pretty dramatic when he's disappointed. "You don't love me! I hate you!" and the like. In his mind, this is true.
Why am I telling you this?
In the workplace, there’s often frustration and pressure.
Things that don’t go according to plan.
When we assume people are "out to get" us…it can create an experience of extreme suffering.
One that we can opt out of, but we choose not to. Because it can feel like everything’s going to go to pot if we let go.
A lot of times I’m able to go with the flow…and sometimes I’m not.
But it does strike me how it is usually SO MUCH EASIER to get to what I want to happen when I respond with a smile or a “sure, let’s try this option” than when I respond with bitterness or snark.
And it’s so much easier to have the journey feel fun, too. It starts to feel less like criticism and more like an exchange of ideas between people who genuinely just want to do what’s best.
I don’t mean that we hand-wave things that truly aren’t okay or gaslight ourselves into thinking everything’s fantastic.
I just mean we make a space…a tiny space…for it to be possible that people actually aren’t out to be jerks and ruin our days when they give us feedback that isn’t what we were expecting.
That maybe whatever it is either isn’t about us, or isn’t what we thought it was. That we truly do have many more chances to get what we're after. And that maybe if we show that we truly listen and care about other people's ideas, they'll respond in kind. I've often found this to be true.
Oh, biscuits!
XOXO,
Cathy