So people occasionally ask me…How do you DO all of that?
All that = FT job, side business, email newsletter, two kids, social life, etc.
I am a regular person. I have lots of flaws. I am also doing far lessthan I’d like to be doing.
But I will say that I do one, really powerful, REALLY simple thing to get my time back.
And it doesn’t just give you like 5 minutes. If you do this, you get a literal expansive ocean of gorgeous YOU time.
…Ready?
…Say NO 🎉 to things that drain your energy & that you don’t want to do.
That’s it…that’s all.
It's simple, but it can be extraordinarily difficult to do…because it requires a willingness to walk away from responsibilities that you feel are expected of you, or that others might be pressuring you to do. It requires the willingness to have others think of you as lazy, selfish, rude, bitchy, a bad woman, etc, when they don't like your answer. But in exchange, you get...FREEDOM.
Example: The person who hosts board game night in my building asked my partner if WE could host it instead, the reasoning being that *I’d* also be able to join. (I usually stay back with the kids while my partner enjoys).
Hosting a game night for someone I don’t really know so that “she can play, too!” is an ABSOLUTE F*CK NO for me.
I would rather tweeze all of my eyebrow hairs out one by one than have to spend two days cleaning, shopping for food, preparing food, and then be sweating trying to keep the kids from kicking over the game table while we’re playing, all while pretending I’m having a good time hanging out with people I don’t know. That’s just me.
For someone out there, hosting a game night and meeting new people would be an enthusiastic YES!
That’s totally cool. We all have things that drain and recharge us. The world needs game night hosts.
I say my exuberant NO’s so that I can get to my enthusiastic YES’s for the projects *I* want to prioritize and the relationships *I* really want to nurture.
A lot of times, I actually get just as much joy out of saying NO as I do saying YES. Like, I get a little micro-dose of my own self-respect. What a buzz!
This principle is equally applicable to increasing productivity at work, looking for jobs, dividing household labor, or planning a vacation. We clear out what we don't want and hold on on to what we DO want, so we can do more of it.
So now it’s your turn:
What will you say F*CK NO 🎉 to today?
What will be a HELL YES 🙌 today?
Cathy